Crack On – Sandra 9

[For back story see lower numbers in archive]

Sandra Xanadu Dedbury had it all worked out. From start to finish. She knew when she was going to talk to Frankie, she knew how, she knew what she would have already done before the conversation, what would happen after the conversation – for both of them – there was nothing that would make this conversation go any other way, and there was certainly nothing that was going to stop it from happening. 

She’d broken bad news to people before. She’d told organisations she didn’t think she could do anything for them any more, or indeed at all. She’d told a few that they were not kind or honest enough for her to be associated with and she’d even told a couple she’d report them if they didn’t change. This wasn’t PR, this was integrity – maybe there was something in that for a rebrand.

As with work, so too with life. Rob would not hold his telling Frankie of his love for Sandra like some sword of Damocles (Sandra wasn’t up to speed with her mythology enough to know if this was a completely appropriate comparison, but the hanging over her bit was good enough). It was cut and dried. Your husband is making unwanted advances towards me and you need to know. Because you’re my sister. Because you’re married to him. Because you have kids. Because. Because it’s distracting me from my work like nothing else.

The conversation would be conducted via phone video at a particular time when one of the children, at least, would have their afternoon nap and Rob would be out the house, back in his safely socially distancing office.

And so she made the call.

“I’ve got something to tell you,” she said, determined to cut to the chase after the initial pleasantries were over and following her road map. “It’s about Rob and you won’t like it.”

“Ri-ight…” said Frankie. “Before you go any further, I think I probably already know what you’re going to say.”

Sandra’s plan glitched. 

“Really?”

“Well, you know, he is my husband and everything. I do know him. And since he’s been ill he’s a changed man.”

“Really?”

“Oh yeah. More honest and open to me in the past few weeks than ever before,” said Frankie, a little on a roll now. “You wouldn’t believe it, really.”

“Really?”

“Really. Can we stop saying ‘really’ now?”

A pause while Sandra looked for something else to say. Her crib sheet had not included this possible avenue. It hadn’t included all those ‘really’s either, but that was unsurprising and irrelevant. What she needed now was something solid to go after. She needed to close the deal.

“So. What has he said?”

“He’s told me that he still likes you,” said Frankie.

“Really?”

“Ah! That word again.”

“Sorry. How – how much did he say he liked me?”

“Oh, quite a lot. You know – the wants to marry you thing, you remember the wanting to marry you thing.”

“When did he… how do you… what did you say to him?”

Frankie sighed. “I said I know my sister and if you hassle her again I’ll file for divorce and sue you for everything you’ve got.”

“Good,” said Sandra. “Good for you. Definitely do that.”

“Might do it anyway,” said Frankie. “Not sure I like the idea of still being in competition with you. I’d rather he wasn’t attracted to you, but, you know, can’t blame him.”

Sandra was, unlike any business or deal conversation she’d had for a while, speechless.

“And you know what,” continued Frankie, “I’m not sure I like this version of Rob. He’s really over the top and sincere. It’s not just that it makes my skin crawl sometimes, it’s really quiet boring. Everything has such significance it’s just appalling. He started crying over a boiled egg yesterday, imagine that. Cracks the top, opens it up and starts weeping into the yolk. I didn’t know what to say to Sukie. Told her he was allergic – hay fever brought on by exposure to eggs. Made it up. Obviously. Think she bought it. She said ‘oh dear’ which was nice.

“Anyway,” Frankie went on, “I should shut up and let you get on with work. Just let me know if he does try it again. But there’s always something you can do to stop him.”

“Which is..?”

“Get yourself a date.”

“Fat chance now.”

“Oh I don’t know, apparently those dating apps are still getting people together even though they're apart.”

It was five minutes after the call when Sandra realised what she should really be doing right now. Getting people apart…together was too good a tag line to miss. For a dedicated app maybe – sure there were existing ones doing their best, but what if there was one specifically to bring people together now. In the new reality? Apart but Together. A virtual hug. A hug which developed and reflected the distancing changes as they occurred. She cleared her desk, and, as was the done thing with all great ideas, started jotting them on the back of an envelope.