Oh, Crumbs – Daniel 31

 

[For back story go here: Story so far, and probably this one.]

[Relevant back story links also within text.]

If Daniel had been asked to predict his downfall he would not have said biscuits. Over-reaching himself, maybe, risking everything on a deal that would make or break him, perhaps, but biscuits? No. Not that biscuits weren’t important to him. He liked chocolate ones as much as the next chocolate biscuit liking person, and there had been (sadly) numerous occasions when a dalliance with a single bourbon had ended in an empty packet and the need for strong coffee, but even then he would argue it was all good fun. Another packet would come along eventually and the one he’d finished off had usually been left there doing nothing on its own for a while.

The day had actually begun well. Joe Wicks was back online, and had been doing a 24 hour workout for the BBC’s Children in Need charity. Daniel and Daisy both jumped around the front room from time to time during this period, encouraging Wicks as much as they could. The morning saw him complete his challenge with much fanfare and dancing around. The school run was more jubilant than usual.

And then Claudia, from work, made a complaint. Daniel thought it was a rather trivial one, but it turned out he was in the minority on this among the workers at Crown Apps.

As Wendy had promised, everyone in the company wherever they were, had been sent a nicely presented randomised packet of biscuits. There was note with each packet saying these were in recognition of the time everyone needed to take a break and suggesting that on a daily basis everyone should make their tea or coffee, take a biscuit and relax. Phone a friend, do a casual video call, whatever you liked. With your biscuits. The note ended by crediting this new initiative to the businesses’ one and only Chief Innovation Officer.

Daniel’s good day came to an abrupt end when Claudia sent him an email, cc’ing in Wendy and asking why she had not been credited with the biscuit idea?

Before he could respond, Wendy had set up a video call to discuss this issue between the three of them. In a young and growing company, she said, it was important to ensure credit fell where credit was due. And with a mainly young and small workforce couldn’t afford to have people feel they were not valued for everything they did. Daniel had a nasty feeling he would be spending at least some of this morning with that fixed grin on his face again while he was told what he’d done wrong.

Between the time the appointment was fixed and the appointment itself, Claudia had been sharing her thoughts – and maybe her biscuits – with other people within the company and the dissent and aggravation against the Chief Innovation Officer spread. Several people had also believed their ideas had been ripped off, one person said it was ‘typical of this company’ and two people started a campaign to return the biscuits, unopened to head office in protest. They were joined by a third, but a fourth suggested it would be more of a protest to just eat the biscuits in one go without doing the ‘talking to someone in a casual way' bit. 

Despite the magnitude of everything else going on in the world, despite the myriad of things which he suspected Claudia and everyone else had to do, despite Joe Wicks’ achievement, this complaint was now consuming everyone, taking up significant band width on the company’s social stream and generally undermining any pleasure the biscuits could ever give anyone. Indeed, as the scandal progressed, Daniel thought he may never ever be able to eat a biscuit again without it tasting bitter and turning to dry crumbs in his mouth.

By the time their video call started Daniel was thinking he might as well fall on his sword and have done with the whole business. It felt like an impossible situation, he was tired, lonely and really wanted to think about something else.

“What’s you’re take on all this, then, Dan?” asked Wendy, as Claudia stared down her video link at him.

“I’m…. I’m truly sorry if this has caused problems…” he began.

“Oh it has,” said Claudia jumping in. “I didn’t realise I was giving you things that you could take credit for. I thought you wanted ideas and would tell everyone where they came from.”

“It does sound to me as if you conducted this exercise without fully informing everyone of the process,” said Wendy. “Or perhaps you simply didn’t think that crediting people for ideas was necessary?”

“To be honest…” said Daniel, trying to frame how he could talk both people round. “To be honest it was a new initiative in the first place…”

“So why not do it properly in the first place?” said Claudia. “It wouldn’t have taken much thought. It wouldn’t have changed what your role was…”

“I was simply thinking of getting this out there…”

“Did he mention me to you at all?” Claudia asked Wendy.

“No – I didn’t,” cut in Daniel. “I was simply…”

“And had this innovation policy been clearly established?”

“If I might finish,” said Daniel, more forcefully and earning himself an uneasy silence. “What I wanted to say was that…. That I appreciate – fully – I fully appreciate everything everyone said to me ever during this work but at the end of the day…”

He trailed off, before finally coming back.

“They’re just biscuits.”

Daniel smiled weakly, realising his last three words may well be the last three he was going to say in the company. He realised they weren’t much of a parting shot, but he also realised he didn’t care.